Introductions are in Order

In reality, not an easy task. But let's start with the basics: I was born in the early fifties. As colour didn't arrive in the UK until the sixties, my childhood was spent in black and white.

Actually I was lucky enough to be brought up in Troon on the west coast of Scotland. It's a peninsula, jutting into the Firth of Clyde so there were beaches to run on, sand dunes to jump off, and rock pools to play in. There was a fishing harbour and a breaker's yard attached to a working shipyard, so ample opportunity for trespassing and mischief. In short a great place to grow up, but you feel too old to do most of the fun stuff over the age of fifteen (we grew up slower then).

So after kicking my heels for a couple of years, time to buckle down, take on some responsibility and get a job; however I've never been ambitious, I've always tried to avoid responsibility and I dislike hard work ... and those are my good points.

To cut a long story short I bounced around for ten years before finding the ultimate slacker's paradise - University: one of the few places you can fool around for 95% of the time then, fuelled by instant coffee, push as much material into short-term memory as possible, sit the exams and hope for the best.

So, how did I stumble from moderately successful student to middle-aged fart? Maybe a story for another day.